A lot of teachers would be uncomfortable with some of these avenues, but for me I truly believe that it has made my teaching more effective, (Research would seem to agree, Link 1, Link 2.) and it is the only way I know how to be. Many times I would see something on Facebook that I could discuss with the students during class the next day to build those connections, or a student would see something I posted about myself or Isaac and then we could use that to build a connection in class. I try to tell myself each year that I am not going to get as close to the students, but I can’t do it. I love teaching and I love it because of the students I get to meet. They change me for the better and hopefully the opposite is true. When the days are tough and I need a break from teaching, the kids are what get me up in the morning and keep me going. If I didn’t have a strong relationship with the students, I wouldn’t enjoy my job nearly as much. I wouldn’t know how to teach any other way.

On Scrubs Dr. Cox says he teaches through fear, but I can’t do that. I have too much fun being a goof with kids and interacting with them. Each day I am not sure what is going to happen in class, but it usually results in us laughing and having a good time. I’ve always believed that I can get more out of the students if they like me and want to work in class for me, if not for physics. Some people yell to manage their classes, but I like to use my relationship with the kids to manage the classroom.

Anyway, the point is that I formed some pretty strong relationships my students this year. I wouldn’t say it was with every student, but on the whole I felt closer to my students this year than any year in the past. One of my big fears in teaching had been that as I got older, I’m 29 now, I would start to lose touch with the students. I have actually found now that the opposite is true. This year I have found that more students have talked to me in an advice type sense than any other year. So, while my relationship with students is different than it was when I started teaching, I find that I am enjoying the new role I am in.

So, now the end of the year comes and I have to say good-bye to these wonderful young people. I do not know why this is so hard for me each year. Part of my says I only see these kids for 44 minutes a day for 180 days this shouldn’t be this hard. But, even knowing that, I feel a void when they leave. The truth of the matter is I see a lot of these kids more than that. Some come in for help, some come by to hang out, and some I just see other times. I love how things go for the first 9 months of the year, but the last week or so is just really depressing. I often refer to it as Post-Prom Depression. It is a rough week because the kids are stressed out and cranky because they are going through a bunch of emotions with high school ending and their teachers piling on projects. I have to battle with them to stay on task because they have senioritis yet I have to be the responsible one. At the same time I just want to hang out with them because they are going to be gone soon. This really makes closure tough to come by.

I try to do somethings to get closure. I give them a little speech with a couple of simple pieces of advice. Then I teach them how to tie a neck-tie. This year I started a new tradition by doing something that my high school calculus teacher Mrs. Courtney O’Berry did that was very memorable for me: I read them Oh The Places You’ll Go by Dr. Seuss. This was received well and I liked it.

Anyway, I am not really sure what I wanted out of this post. Mostly I just felt like I needed to get some thoughts off of my mind. I love teaching and interacting with students and I would never conduct myself in any other way than fully committed to building relationships with students. This year in particular I have grown particularly close to two students and they have helped me grow as a teacher and as a parent. They may never know they affect they have had on me just like I will never know the effect I have had on many students. I recently read a quote, The true meaning of life is to plant trees under whose shade you do not expect to sit. I don’t really like quoting other people, but this really sums up what I believe in a very elegant statement. I guess the hardest part is never knowing if the things I do on a daily basis have a positive lasting impact.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jpEnFwiqdx8

When I watch a video like this (I have seen similar one before) I feel extremely overwhelmed. The amount of knowledge and information out there is so huge. I find myself constantly saying that the combined knowledge of the world is at our fingertips and we just need to start taking advantage of it. Look at the growth of Facebook, and that was primarily with college students. Also, Facebook was free and televisions weren’t but those number are still huge.Now, I wonder if Twitter is going to beat that to be biggest fastest.

That there are more texts sent each day then people in the world, Holy Cow! Adults often just mock the younger generation and their texting, but to ignore the phenomenon is just ignorant. The Technology Tailor on WGN Radio, Alex Goldstein (or something like that) constantly mocksFacebook and Twitter and says he has no need for them, but it is getting to a point where you don’t have a choice. The world is communicating in these ways, and people who shun the technological change will be like people who rejected TV for radio until that battle was over.

I love knowledge and information, but I think we need to figure out how to handle all of it and what exactly it is that we need to teach kids. The fact that a weeks worth of newspaper is equivalent to a lifetime of knowledge for a previous generation (I don’t remember which century) is staggering. And schools now are trying to teach all of it to kids by the time they are 18. Information that used to be taught to seniors is now taught to freshmen and they are often not ready to hear it and don’t retain it.

Fundamentally I often think we need to take a step back and evaluate what we are teaching and train students to be learners independent of what they learn. I have often thought to myself that my true goal is to make myself obsolete. I have not accomplished this yet, but it would be a glorious day if we could equip all students with the skills to fight for those jobs that aren’t even thought of yet.

That in and of itself is a powerful idea and I am going to mention that the reason they have to learn whatever area of physics  hasn’t been invented yet so they better pay attention.

Today’s good thing was that 3rd hour which is usually the least productive period was the most productive.

1. I love teaching. However, it is way more work than I ever imagined it would be and I have a tremendous amount more respect for the good teachers I have had.
2. I love being a parent, but it is way more work that I ever imagined it would be (people always tell you it will be hard, and I beleived them, but you don’t know until you are there yourself.) I have a tremendous amount more respect for my parents now that I have a son.
3. I love Star Wars. I don’t know why. I know it (probably) isn’t real but the pageantry and the grandeur and the philosophy of it all is just so mesmerizing. It truly is an Oprah.
4. I have ADD and probably have my whole life. I was not officially diagnosed until I was 23, and knowing that I have it makes it easier as a teacher to deal with students who also have ADD (even if they don’t know they have it.) I also take drugs for ADD and, at least for me, they work.
5. I do not currently have a job next year and this weighs on me more than I let on or want to think about.
6. All I really want out of life is to do something that matters. I don’t know what that will be and I don’t know if I will know what it is (it may already have happened) but I will keep working at it until I die.
7. My son is named for Sir Isaac Newton (perhaps the single most important person of the millennium) and I think this is awesome and I don’t know if Gina will ever truly appreciate how much I appreciate and love her for allowing that.
8. When I was in 5th (possibly 6th) grade I wore a sweater to school that apparently didn’t match the rest of my clothes and the other kids called me “Color Blind Pe-Pe,” and now my wife has to approve all of my outfits for matching before I wear them to school so that the kids don’t make fun of me.
9. I have won one popularity contest in my life. I did a poor job fulfilling the office I was elected to.
10. I have a hard time sitting still and relaxing. Even now I am watching Ghost Whisperer, but I feel the need to be typing this at the same time. I think my life would be better if I was better at focusing on one thing at a time.
11. I am not sure if I believe in paranormal activity. I don’t like to discount any possibilities in life, but I also believe that everything in this world has a physical explanation and I don’t know that psychic visions or magic have a real explanation.
12. I don’t mind driving in the snow, but I get very nervous when I can’t see the lines on the road and I don’t know where the lanes are.
13. When the baby cries I do not freak out, and I think this is a good thing,
14. When I am bored or nervous I bite my nails. When my nails are gone I start biting the skin on the tips of my fingers. While I know this may be a little gross, it is what I do.
15. I am often amazed at the fact that the world can be described mathematically and that we didn’t realize this until the 1600′s. The more I learn about science the more beautiful it is and the way it all weaves together is amazing.
16. In that same light, I am amazed at the development of human thought. From the time Aristotle said objects fall down because that is there natural state (great reasoning) in around 400 BC until Galileo and Newton show up in the 1600′s, no one ever thinks to perform and experiment. All of a sudden Newton comes along and says, “Oh, well, we should probably actually test these theories we have.” Mind blowing!
17. I find wearing a sweatshirt and stocking cap indoors very comforting, even when it is a little too warm.
18. I worked at a Boy Scout camp every summer from the time I was 14 until I was 23.  After that I worked at football camp in the summer. All in all, I haven’t had a summer vacation in 15 years, and I have no idea what people do with all of the free time.
19. I am currently actively watching the following non-syndicated shows: 24, The Big Bang Theory (newest addition and awesome), American Idol, House, Lost, Ghost Whisperer, Numbers, CSI: NY, CSI, Scrubs, Fringe. I watch too much TV.
20. I live one block from the high school I graduated from. This was not the plan, but I think it is cool.
21. I have two general ways I dress: I wear dress pants and a polo or shirt & tie to work, and I wear wind pants with a T-Shirt the rest of time. I very rarely wear anything else. It’s all or nothing.
22. I have only had three hairstyles I can remember. The one I have now, a bowl cut, and a normal part to the side hair cut.
23. My favorite things to do on Facebook are to read people’s status updates and see what they are up to and wishing people happy birthday on their birthday. Although I recently heard someone on the radio that they think people wishing other people a happy birthday on Facebook could be a bad thing because it removes the intimacy from birthdays. I disagree. I think Facebook actually helps make social relationships better.
24. I have owned one car in my life (a 2002 Toyta Echo. I love this car because it has a lot of head room and because it makes great 3-point turnarounds and U-Turns.
25. I hate needles and shots. I don’t mind blood or other medical operations, but if I see a needle or even think about getting a shot, I get very sick and uncomfortable.

For me it was a personal accomplishment because I am not always comfortable confronting students and I did and it went well.

What really makes me sad is that I am now going to have to go out and apply for jobs. When I am offered one of those jobs in the next few months, I am going to have to take because I need a job in order to take care of my family. So, won’t be able to tell a job that is guaranteed to me to wait until LZ figures it out in April, May, or even June. This really starts to get to me because of the time and effort and really parts of myself I have given to that job. I don’t work at half speed and I really have put myself into that job and I feel like I have been dumped.

But, in all honesty, the part that makes me the most sad (I actually even cried a little because I was so sad) is that I will most likely not get to see the bowling team through next year. I always told myself that minimally I was going to see one class through bowling to try and get the program established and then decide what I wanted to do. I got lucky and the group I have right now is amazing. I never thoght I would feel this close to a group of students, but then, BAM, it happened. There are times when I want to wring some of the necks, but I am really going to miss the fun times we have had.

I really worry that when I get to my new job, that I am going to be relunctant to get that attached to the people there. I hope I don’t end up that way, but that is how I feel right now. I felt like I finally found a district where I had a place and role. I was coaching, teaching, working with technology and then the rug got pulled out from under me. I would like to think that I will be back there next year, but I have no idea and have to proceed as such.

There are people who are worse off than me in this situation, and I wish the district could have gotten their money right the past couple years so that they would have had the reserves in place to handle this. Oh well…

While at camp I did a lot of hiking and some alone thinking and I am really being eaten up inside that I really pissed off a friend and I don’t know how to make things better. I am mailing a card now to that effect, we’ll see.

Next week I am off to my physics conference for 3 weeks with sweet, sweet dorm food. I get to learn about teaching physics using models. I don’t fully know what that means, but it is supposed to be pretty sweet. Then I return and football camp starts and then it is downhill until school starts up.

I am supposed to study for my GRE some time this summer, but I have been pushing that off. I guess it has only been 2 weeks since school ended, but it is going to fly past. Although, after this physics thing, I have very little else to do.

All for now.

All is going. I learned recently that I don’t get paid for another 15 days which means almost 1 month with no paycheck, coupled with a lack of sub calls for Gina, this means very little income. But bills have been shuffled, and all will be well, I think.

If you know of a school looking for an el. ed. teacher, let me know.

Football is going well, although it is sukcing up A LOT of my time. This is the first Saturday I have had off, but I had to trapse up to the doctor to get a referral now that I have ventured into the exciting world of HMOs.

The cat is healthy, so all is not bad.

Take care.

Part of me felt odd/wrong that I would be getting a job were I will be doing less work, easier work, and being paid more.

Then a very wise friend of mine said, “perhaps you’re looking at it from the wrong perspective.. Maybe you were doing more work, harder work, and you weren’t being compensated appropriately”

That totally blew my mind.