Tonight I was watching the Bear’s game and went to make a tweet about the game and I occasionally like to scan through the trending topics. Well on Twitter (and on Facebook) there were a lot of posts about Kanye West. So, I followed the link on Twitter to search for the story and it said that Kanye dissed Taylor Swift. I was outraged because, as anyone who knows me knows, I adore Taylor Swift. (Yes I’m a 29 year old man and I’m okay with that.)
So, I read a story about it on Rolling Stone and I couldn’t believe it.
Before I passed judgment, I wanted to see it for myself. So, after several Google and YouTube searches involving people’s personal responses, I finally found the clip, posted below.
So, I watched the clip and it was surreal that anyone, I don’t care how famous you are, would go on stage and do that. It was almost as bad and as when Faith Hill had a tantrum when she lost to Carrie Underwood at the CMAs in 2006.
That maybe wasn’t quite as bad because she was at least off stage, but she had to know the camera was on.
In any event, I am starting to see a disturbing trend of public figures acting out in ways that are clearly inappropriate. Kanye couldn’t have thought that what he did was appropriate. Especially, and maybe this shouldn’t matter, considering that this is a 19 year old girl who has done nothing but be a shining role model in the media. Kanye apparently proceeded to flip the bird to the crowd while Taylor was crying backstage.
Then we have Chris Brown who decided that he could beat his girlfriend Rihana to within an inch of her life.
What these people all have in common is that the apologized about what they did after the fact and that was supposed to make it all better. And it seems like we in a America are all to willing to forgive. Now, this may seem contradictory on my part because I have posted that I think Michael Vick should be allowed to play football again, but that is different. The biggest difference is that Vick not only apologized, but he also spent 18 months in custody. Additionally, I don’t have to forgive Vick for him to keep playing football, no one does.
Here is a picture of Kanye leaving the show. Look at his right hand, maybe we will see what the really cause of the outburst was:
I would almost guarantee that tomorrow Kanye West will apologize to Taylor Swift. I would encourage her not to accept it. It can not be sincere. How can a person walk all the way on to the stage, take the microphone from someone, make that statement, and then walk away and flip off the crowd and actually be sorry. President Obama accepted Congressman Wilson’s, I know that, but that is the problem. We live in a society now where public people can do or say what they want and then apologize and it’s okay.
I am not saying we should never forgive people and I am not saying that we shouldn’t move on when conflict occurs, but we also need to hold people accountable when they act irresponsibly when they should know better. The governor of a state should be allowed to just disappear for a week and then just be embraced back into the fold by his state or by his wife.
So, I say, do not just forgive Mr. West. I say boycott his music and his antics until he can behave like an adult. I was thinking about Jay Leno’s return to TV tomorrow, but I will not watch if Kanye is still going to perform. I have occasionally thought of listening to his music because my good friend Jenny likes his music, but that will never happen now. This act stupid and apologize culture needs to end!
There has been a lot of talk regarding Michael Vick this week and whether he should be allowed back into the NFL. Specifically many radio talk shows, Simon’s Rendezvous for one, ask callers, do you forgive Michael Vick? I have to wonder why it matters if anyone forgives him and if they don’t, why does that affect whether or not he keeps playing in the NFL.
Vick is an adult who committed a crime. I have to believe he knew what he did was legally wrong. He apparently didn’t find it morally wrong, perhaps because it was part of his normal cultural upbringing. We know that what he did was very bad and was not a one time incident, so I don’t want to belabor that point, but here is one quote from Ed Sayres, president of the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.
And those that are supporting him as a person (not necessarily as a player), including Dan Reeves, Tony Dungy, and the owner of the Falcons make no apologies for his actions.
But, what about the question of forgiveness. There are several different schools of thought on what forgiveness this and how and when it should be given. Some bloggers, such as Mary MacElveen, say that we just shouldn’t forgive him him at all. Going so far as to say that
At times, people seem to forget that humans, in general, do not hold dogs on the same level as other humans. Granted, killing dogs is not something that we should condone, but the penalties for doing such is lower than committing the same act to a human. So, I can’t help but wonder what Mary thinks we should do. It seems that she thinks Vick should have to be ostracized from society:
This logic is just wrong. There are crooks in every profession and they are not reviled by their colleagues. How many politicians are crooked and still in office. How many business people get convicted of a crime and then change jobs and come back? And, we have the 45 year old Italian man who bought the rights to a Romanian girl’s virginity, and he is still doing fine. So, does MacElveen think we should convict Vick for life? Should he receive the death penalty? On her blog you can’t post comments, so I will never know the answer.
One interesting thought comes from Jeanne Safer, a New York psychotherapist:
Safer also authored the book Forgiving and Not Forgiving: Why Sometimes It’s Better NOT to Forgive, which makes sense given her comments. Her thought process is probably most in line with mine. I don’t know that I forgive him, but I don’t know that that is my place. He didn’t wrong me and I don’t know what my forgiveness would mean.
The part of the coverage about this whole mess that starts to agitate me, and the part I really wanted to write about, is the attitude that people like MacElveen take, that Vick should be basically barred from his career because he committed a crime. The whole situation reminds me of the controversy that has been raised by Felony Franks in Chicago, which is a hot dog place which hires felons as employees. Or the classic story Les Miserables where Jean Val Jean can’t find a job because he was a convict. We want these criminals to start a new productive life, but then, apparently, we don’t want them to do what they are good at. This attitude just seems like it will cause these convicts to go back to their bad habits and create a vicious cycle.
So, do I forgive Michael Vick, I don’t know, not really. I think he knew better and should have stopped the gambling. But, he didn’t do anything to me, so I don’t know if I have anything to forgive him for. Furthermore, it doesn’t matter if I forgive him or not. The man was arrested, tried (well he plead) and then went to jail and served his time. In jail he found God, cried at night, and played prison footballLongest Yard style. So, it seems that he has done what society has decided he needs to do in order to rejoin the rest of us, so why would we stop him from earning a living.
People act like you have be extra-virtuous to play a professional sport. I understand that these athletes end up being role models, but that isn’t their responsibility. If they embrace that role, I have a lot more respect for them, but how long do we need to punish Vick? I think it would be nice if those people who refuse to “forgive” Vick would get off their high horses and be quiet. The man made a stupid mistake, but he has served his time and it is time to move on.
Lastly, some have tried to make a comparison between Michael Vick and Pete Rose. The argument is basically that what Pete Rose did is less bad than what Vick did and Rose is banned from baseball and yet Vick can play football. However, there is a huge difference. Pete Rose bet on the sport he was playing and broke the rules of his sport and hence is banned from baseball. Vick broke a law, did nothing to harm the game of football, and now wants to play football. Vick committed a horrible crime, but there is no justification to ban him from football. Rose broke a rule of baseball and the consequence of that was a ban from baseball, and now he is serving his sentence just like Vick did.
