As I sit here with less than 12 hours until the fourth member of our little family is born, I have a chance to reflect on the last three years and what lies ahead. Child birth is a weird feeling. Unlike other decision and changes in your life, you can’t change your mind at the last minute. No matter what happens, as time marches inexorably forward, there will be a new life entering the world shortly after 10 AM June 13th. I’ve been trying to sift through my emotions but am still not sure what to make of it all.
There is a part of me (and at times I feel guilty for this emotion) that is sad to see this chapter of lives end. Having little IKup has been so much fun and I enjoy the time the three of us have had together. I found myself just squeezing him tight trying to hold on to this feeling before everything changes. I don’t even know that it is the birth of the new child that is making me feel this way, but rather how independent he is becoming. As much as we have tried taught him to be independent, and as much as he should be independent, it is still hard to realize he needs you a little less everyday. Now, he wakes up from his nap says, “Dad, I’m need to go poopy. I’m going to sit on the potty and go poopy.” Then he does it.
Ultimately I am excited to see what kind of person he becomes, but it is a little sad at times to not be the one that has to put him on the potty and those sorts of things.
As for child number two, I am very anxious to see if he turns out to be as stellar as Isaac did. Gina and I just tried to do our best with IKup using logic and common sense and he turned out pretty spectacular. The more I think about it, I don’t really think that a second kid is going to just be twice as much work. It is not just like we are now going to raising a second kid, we have to also manage the relationship between the two children. That is my biggest concern. In teaching, I have seen many families of siblings. Some turn out to be the same as each other (either both awesome or both not so awesome) or they turn out to be opposites of each other. I don’t know that there is really a trick to making to happen, you just have to go with your gut.
Ultimately I am hoping that having two little guys running around is going to be more than twice as much fun. I am very excited for IKup to have someone to play with (in several months that is) all the time. It will be different because child number two will have to share a lot of experience that IKup go to himself, but as they share them together, hopefully they will have even more fun.
So, I’m not sure if I making sense or not, but I can hopefully sleep now having gotten those thoughts out of my head and into the cloud. We soon will be a square family.